Forgetting My First Love

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. 

- Corinthians 13:4-8a (ESV)

We talk of love. We write stories and poems, make movies and sing songs about it. Many people have the famous 'Love' Scripture read at their weddings -only to divorce some years later.

Children love their parents when they are young, and then rebel against them as they begin to 'think for themselves.' Parents love their children. But some only do so when it is convenient.

One of the last things Christ commanded His disciples before He went to the cross was, "Love each other as I have loved you." 

There is an Early Church legend about the final teachings from the famous disciple, John, the only one who was not martyred. He had lived a long and suffering life; a man who had walked with Christ and stood at the foot of the cross, who took the responsibility of caring for Christ's own mother, had suffered exile on a rocky island because of his faith, and is the only person in Biblical history to have received the full and final revelation of Jesus Christ. And in all of his knowledge, wisdom and experience, his last teachings were summed up in one line, "Brothers, love one another." 

The legend reports that is all he had to say. Such simple words. Words of guidance. Guidance that has changed lives and nations for over two thousand years. Even before Christ came as a man, His words were passed in the form of the famous Ten Commandments. They were the basic guidelines on how a child of God should live. But mankind, full of willful ignorance and rebellion, couldn't understand how to love as God commanded. So Christ gave us an example to follow. The commandment was not new. It was following His own example that was new. "Love as I have loved."

I've discovered that the easiest times for me to love Christ is in suffering. Because it is in those times that I need Him most. When I struggle to love Him and give Him my time and energy, and love others as He has loved me, is when my life is easy. 

Sometimes I repent of an easy life. It is when I forget my First Love. 

And when I forget my First Love, I also forget how to love others. I see the world, and all the people in it, through my own eyes and not through His. I make my own judgments based on my personal opinions rather than relying on His judgments based on His infallible knowledge. 

How did I get so far away from Him? ...again. 

Forgive me, Father, for not keeping You first in my life and making You the center of every area. Even when I do good it is nothing if I have done it in my own strength. For I have done it in my own pride and self-sufficiency. How different I am when my heart does not stray from You. 

Keep me by Your, O Lord, and never let me wander. Discipline me when I need it, forgive me so that I do not carry shame, show me Your ways and teach me Your statutes. Give me Your wisdom and knowledge that I may teach others for Your Names' sake. Fill my heart with Your love so that it overflows for all those around me.  Show me how to lead and how to follow, to work with others as well as by myself, and how to discern when each is necessary. Teach me to see others through Your eyes. Strengthen my hands for Your Kingdom's work. Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.

I am Yours, and You are mine. 

Consume me. For You are my First Love. No one can ever take Your place. Not even me. Save me from myself, and raise me up for Your glory. 

For Your's is Kingdom, the Power, and Glory forever. Amen.